Feeling blue (but mostly tired)

I don't know if it is the impeding winter season (lasts way too long in Sweden), me feeling left behind, the old Malmö depression, being broke, or what, but my emotions throw me between highs and lows.

Rachael is having a great time over in Seattle, and sometimes I feel jealous that I am stuck here, but man does she deserve it! She didn't exactly have the time of her life living in Malmö (except for the part about living with me :), and I hope she is savouring every second of her newfound independence and friendships. I know she is.

Me feeling this way is not about her, even though I miss her like hell. It is about me being unable to live in the present moment. I'm like forever stuck between the nostalgic shimmer of was-time, and my unrealistic ideas of what it will be like in then-time. This goes straight against my new life philosophy, and I will stop it right here. Right now.

Manifesto:
In whatever situation you find yourself, and whatever events, good or bad, led you there, remember that the past is solid as rock, but the present is moldable like body-temperature clay. The future history is part of you, but remember: your only instrument of change is the present!

You can affect the outcome of any situation, not only by your actions, but also by your thoughts, your mood, and most certainly by the way you act towards other people.

Thankfulness does not go by unnoticed.

Everything is connected.

And I mean it!